Told you so (like a hundred times!)
I have a fever of 102.6, but I'm nowhere near as miserable as I should be.
:-)
I woke up from my fever-induced nap today to find two centipedes crawling on me. Even though I’d rather have a spider or a snake crawl on me than one of those creepy centipedes with their excessive number of legs, I'm totally mellow. There will be no frantic yellowpages search for exterminators.
:-)
I bought a new laptop today (fever notwithstanding), and I absolutely love it, though it really wasn‘t an expense I’d planned to incur anytime soon. Unfortunately, my old laptop died a couple days ago, nearly catching fire in the process, so I had no choice. I had someone remove the hard drive from the dead laptop, and for the last 48 hours, I’ve been trying to copy whatever files I can to an external hard drive using a USB connector thingy and my brother‘s old laptop. It looks like I lost some stuff, but it could be worse.
:-)
My university hasn‘t sent me my diploma yet due to some kind of delay affecting just my graduating class. I know I graduated, but my father thinks I‘m lying, and has been coming up with all kinds of theories as to what I've been doing for the last several years--since I obviously wasn't earning my degree. Did you know I’ve been using and selling drugs all this time? I didn’t either! It's like living with that anonymous commenter from two weeks ago, but today, I could care less. I told him that whatever explanation he wanted to come up with was fine with me. I’m considering not showing him the diploma when I finally get it just to see what else he comes up with.
:-)
I came across my first white hair last night, but instead of crying or screaming for tweezers, I decided to keep it. I can show it to people who ask me what grade I’m in.
:-)
Of course there’s a reason why I’m so carefree and impervious to such annoyances right now: After 1 year and 2 months of fighting, banging my head against the wall, and pulling my hair out, I HAVE FINALLY TRIUMPHED OVER THE FORCES OF STUPIDITY!!!
Remember that ridiculous $3,000 bill I got from the most seriously moronic and most astoundingly inept hospital billing department in the history of civilization? Since I wrote that post, I made 6 more phone calls, sent 2 more faxes, and spent an additional 5 hours or so on the phone without any real hope of accomplishing anything. BUT, I got a call today (technically yesterday) from a hospital billing employee finally admitting defeat. This imbecile, who had previously taken great pleasure in telling me I was fully and irrefutably responsible for paying the bill, was forced by her supervisor to call me and let me know that the hospital is going to eat ALL the charges: the charges for the visit, the mysterious extra $1,000 charge that wasn't on the original bill, the late fees, the collection fees, and the interest fees. It appears that I've finally convinced these idiots to take that four-year old bill and shove it up-- Since the good news placed me below my potty mouth threshold, I didn‘t have any kind of colorful response to the news. I simply asked her to send it to me in writing, thanked her for her help, and hung up. She won't be so lucky if that letter fails to materialize, though.
I know I should wait to see it before I believe it, and I will hold off on celebrating until I have that letter in my possession, but before I go camp out by my mail box, I gotta say thank you to everyone for listening to me vent last week, and for the kind comments about the template and the new profile picture. You guys made me blush so much that all the blood being redirected from my brain to my face is what saved me from a stroke! I never thought I'd post a picture, but then I figured that if anyone in my offline life found my blog and read it, they'd easily figure out who I was anyway, with or without a picture. I mean, how many people do you know whose limbs constantly pop out of place, who have dislocated their shoulder on an airplane, who were just in an Egyptian ER, etc.? All of that narrows down my identity pretty well. Besides, this way, you’ll recognize me if you run into me offline and, unlike certain people I’ve dealt with this week, you’ll know not to use my arm to support your weight while you fix your shoe, not to ask me to help you carry your couch down the stairs, and not to call 911 on me if you happen to catch me in a dislocated state! :-P
Posted by Girl, Dislocated at 04:44
23 Comments:
I had a friend in high school whose parents were from Egypt, and they didn't trust ANYTHING their kids did. I just can't imagine how hard that is, but it's admirable that you're there while you are trying to help your sister.
By 
Avitable, at
09:11
Wait. You mean your NOT selling drugs??? So then who did I order my ecstasy with...
That is really good news about the hospital bill... but I totally agree that the celebration should wait until you get it in writing... and until your fever goes away.
Partying with a fever is really not much of a party at all.
By New York City's Watchdog, at
10:13
Great news about the hospital bill. I think once you get it in writing maybe you could frame it with the gray hair that all this caused and hang it on a wall.
By Not a Granny, at
10:18
Avitable - I don't know what it is with some of these Egyptians! Most of them are normal (my father's brother is awesome!), but a few of them think it's perfectly alright to treat their kids (especially the first-borns) like multi-convicted felons! Fortunately, things aren't as bad now that I'm an adult as they were when I use to live here when I was younger.
NYCWD - Well. . . you see, I was taking drugs at the same time, so at some point I lost track of the fact that I was supposed to be dealing and not using. Shit. That might explain your missing ecstasy. My bad.
Not a Granny - I've been trying to pick out a frame since I got off the phone with them! I like the idea of including the gray hair!
By Girl, Dislocated, at
10:49
I don't usually mind bugs, but waking up to a centipede crawling on me would have seriously freaked me out.
That's awesome that things finally worked out in your favor. I hope you start feeling better soon. Take care.
By Orpheus, at
19:06
Really good to hear the imbecile at the hospital was made to eat crow, GD! I'll keep my fingers crossed that you get confirmation in writing, though.
By rizlablue, at
22:10
I don't normally have a problem with bugs, but centipedes? I think not.
Why do you have a fever? What kind of sick have you got? Whatever it is, I hope you feel lots better.
The bill thing is awesome. Course, after all that, I think you should send them a bill!
By Miss Ann Thrope, at
00:37
Orpheus - Thanks :) Waking up to something crawling on you is always worse than finding a bug on you while you're awake, but I can think of other bugs I'd prefer to find on me instead of centipedes.
Riz - I love the fact that she had to be the one to tell me! I'm keeping my fingers crossed too, and hoping that mailing a letter isn't beyond her expertise.
Miss Ann - Thanks, my head and my body hurt, and I think I have strep throat (it hurts and I see pus), but I'm not positive. Billing the hospital sounds like such a fun idea! I'd add all kinds of random charges, send them conflicting statements, make the due date one week before the statement date, charge 50% interest for every minute their payment's late, and get a 900 number to use as my "billing department" phone number, then put them on hold for 3 hours when they called.
By Girl, Dislocated, at
05:04
So it's snowing out here in the west...I guess you could ask where it isn't snowing, since it is December now...duh...sorry...I went out to start my car and the drivers side door refused to unlock. Great!!! I was planning to be to work early this morning and well that didn't work out. I'm now sitting here at work reading about your good fortune with the hospital bill, the bad illness that you seem to have, your missing dipolma, the fact that you OBVIOUSLY have a nice stash of some drugs and I was thinking it's a good thing you don't have a car that refuses to let you into it because I'm sure climbing through the passenger side door and nearly killing yourself would start your day or maybe your next roadtrip to hell off in a hurry!
I'm trying hard not to jinx myself by saying the dreaded words that Murphy so loves to hear..."Hey, it could be..."
Hope you start to feel better soon!
By 
, at
09:30
Ok so CLEARLY I missed the boat, on account of I've been rebelling it up and too drunk to think bahah.
Anyways, I adore the new layout and display picture - you are absolutely gorgeous! And the hearts are adorable!
New laptop eh? I want one. Hehe!
By Sarcastica, at
20:11
You won! I love winning wars against retarded people! :D
Good luck with the new laptop and convincing your Dad that you actually did get yourself and edumacation!
By Kateastrophe, at
23:32
Chrissy - It snowed here too. :( It was the first time in 5 years that I've seen snow, and it bummed me out, but you make a good point--at least I didn't have to crawl through any cars today! :) I hope your day at work went well (as well as it can), and that your driver side door decided to unlock at the end of the day!
Sarcastica - Thank you! :) But next time, make sure you time your drunkeness around my posts, k? :-P (kidding!)
Kateastrophe - I love it too. I can't believe I didn't yell "I win, you lose!" into the phone when I got the call. I'm actually more anxious about getting the hospital's letter admitting their defeat, than I am about the diploma. And if by "good luck with the new laptop" you mean "don't almost set this one on fire too," I'll do my best! :D
By Girl, Dislocated, at
23:47
Congrats on the hospital bills! The one and only time I was a patient, the hospital waived the cost of my stay when I showed them my tax returns for the past 3 years. They realized I didn't MAKE the amount of money they wanted in a whole year and there was no way I could pay them at the time.
Gotta love a hospital owned by rich nuns. :)
By Coyote Mike, at
15:59
Ha! Rich nuns? They should have paid you then! Isn't that part of being holy? Giving money to the poor and stuff?
By Girl, Dislocated, at
18:06
Well, maybe, but only after they buy the new Hummers. Nuns sometimes need to go offroad :P
By Coyote Mike, at
17:03
Yes, of course. That's a given. Obviously I meant after they buy new Hummers. :P
By Girl, Dislocated, at
01:02
Medical bills and administrative mistakes--they always come at the times we're least prepared to deal with them, when our defenses and spirits are at their lowest. So glad your hassle got ironed out.
Hope your fever is dissipating....and taking the centipedes with it!
By San, at
14:54
Woohoo! Take that inept hospital staff!
Saw your other comment back to me - I thought someone, somewhere, once told me that if a bill is passed xx amount of time and the insurance company refused to pay it, then legally, you don't have to pay it either. Maybe they were just blowing smoke up my arse or maybe it was just for that particular state? Who knows...glad they finally admitted defeat!
Ilexa Belladonna
By , at
15:07
San - Thank you, my fever is totally gone, and I haven't seen any centipedes for a whole three days now!
Ilexa - That concept sounds a lot more reasonable than the way things seem to be now! I'll have to double check that there isn't some law like that being kept a secret from all the patients drowning in hospital bills out there.
By Girl, Dislocated, at
11:59
Good thing that the hospital bill was settled and i just realised that you posted a picture of you there. I would say you are so beautiful!
By Chase, at
20:54
Thank you, Chase! :)
By Girl, Dislocated, at
10:16
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